I work part-time. I find it very, very hard, juggling the family, the household and making sure everyone is happy. I think its the worst of all worlds, Wednesday afternoons are always like a living hell for me. That’s the day when I go to work for precisely half the day. I find it very hard switching from work mode to mum mode through the transitional matter of a cheese sandwich.
I view my desk at work as a sort of Command Centre, its from there that I navigate through cyberspace and the nuances of Collections Management in a medium sized museum. In other words I have a telephone, the Internet and a kettle within easy reach. I fiddle about with XML scripts and the database and very occasionally tweet with people on behalf of the museum (Jarvis Cocker did bring a smile to my face this week). Sometimes, I venture away from my bespoke chair which has my name tippexed on the back, purely because people kept stealing it, to the museum stores. There I study, research and catalogue natural history specimens, social history bits and bobs, costume and archaeological pots. Sometimes I wander around the galleries thinking how wonderful it is that I can open any display case and hold any item. I like visitors to the museum, but its absolutely at its best when there is no-one there (keep that secret!) a sort of museum curators bonus. I am master of my own affairs and apparently it is my role to ‘manage by influence’, ahem.
So it is from this state of play that I return home and find myself treading on Lego, hoovering Cheerios from the carpet and being walloped by Barbie dolls. At home I don’t really have a Command Centre, although I know that for some mums it is the kitchen. No, I am saddled with the noose of a 24 hour movable Command with occasional technical support from the husband. I cannot manage by influence, rather I must manage by sheer volume and threats. I am driven mad by children’s television and I am increasingly finding that my Command Centre is the downstairs loo. Purely because I can lock myself in and have some peace.
The Empire must strike back soon. I must regain some control and I must take over the living room once more, the Command Centre must by its very nature be at the heart of my Empire. Whilst I am at home anyhow….